So I just want to ask a question or two about the emotions of an adoptive mom. Would you rather that the birth/first mom of your adopted child actually not love her child? Does it bother you to think about the fact that she(first/birth mom) gestated and gave birth and is biologically connected to your adopted child and you are not? Would you rather not know or hear a birth/first mom talk about her experience of pregnancy and birth? Does it make you feel less of a mom to see that you adopted child has traits that you do not but that the birth/first family does? Are you ever afraid that the biological connection between the first/birth family will be stronger than your connection through nuturering? Do you want to see the birth/first mom and or family(even though there are capable) as incapable of raising your adopted child so you feel more validated in your role as a parent?
I want the most honest answers to this. I know these are tough questions. Feel free to tell me whatever you need too.
