Best fictional portrayals of adoption?

Posted November 11th, 2008 by dawn

I watch the show "Brothers and Sisters", and have been disappointed with some aspects of their adoption storyline. Specifically they used the term "our birthmother" before they had even met her, the expectant mom referred to herself as "The Birthmom" and they were expecting a poor, young girl but when the expectant mom turned out to be an adult MD the main character assumed she would change her mind because she wasn't s poor teenager I guess. They used terms like "adoption plan" so I know the writers did some minimal research into the supposedly correct terms, but I don't think they went deep enough.

The Desperate Housewives adoption story line years back was a horror show, but it fit those characters so I am unsure if it was meant to be portrayed sensitively.

An old movie with Glen Close called "Immediate Family" treated the issue very sensitively, showing the formation of relationships and the beginnings of an open adoption, surprising since it was made in 1989

There is horrible Lifetime Movie called Baby Dance, that will twist the guts out of anyone with an ounce of compassion. Do not watch it.

I haven't seen Juno, and am not sure if I want to.

So, what movies or TV shows have you seen with adoption themes, and how do you think adoption was handled?

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The best portrayed

On November 12th, 2008 cindy.psbm says:

The best portrayed 'birthmother' has to be the girl on 'Grey's Antomy'. Her name escapes me just now but that was the best story line that I have seen about adoption. Honesty I am not that picky about how adoption is portrayed. I am a birthmother and want the truth of adoption to be 'out there' but also I am happy to see anything that even remotely brings adoption into the story. Also another really good story line was one I saw on the show 'Medium' on the second season there was an episode called 'Time Out of Mind' where a women who put her daughter for adoption to protect her from her father in the 1950's gives the present-day main character of the show dreams so that her now older daughter can be saved from a life-threatening illness. This women was in essence a birthmother but they never said that at all in the show. I did not like Juno at all. I thought it made women who placed children for adoption seem unloving towards the child and was waaay to neat and tidy a story. This 'Brothers and Sisters' show has bad acting and story lines all the time. I have tried to watch it because I used be a fan of Calista Flockhart. Now I see that she is not that good an actor. It doesn't surprise me that this story line is full of holes and stuff that doesn't make sense. The whole show has been that way since the start. The same with Desparate Housewives. They had some good shows in the beginning but now they are just trying to be as crazy as possible to get ratings. These shows don't have bad attitudes toward adoption, they are just bad.

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Baby Dance was awful.Juno

On November 11th, 2008 rredhead says:

Baby Dance was awful.
Juno was great!
Simply based on what you've described, I don't see anything "wrong" with how "Brothers and Sisters" is portraying adoption. Not everyone uses the term firstmother, nor do they call mothers who are considering placement expectant moms. Should a TV show be a role model for the preferred language, or should it use the language that is most commonly used? I don't know. The stereotypical birthmom is a younger woman, so I don't see anything wrong with acknowledging that. I think it's great that the e/bmom isn't a teenager. And the idea that someone in a professional situation might be less likely to place than the stereotype, again, is a common idea. So, I think the show is presenting adoption in many ways as it is, as opposed to in the best possible light.
But I've not seen the show, so I don't know.
Judging Amy had an adoption subplot many years ago. It was acceptable, but nothing great, and probably inaccurate.

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I do expect them to do some

On November 11th, 2008 MamaB2C says:

I do expect them to do some research for sensitivity purposes.

For example, "our birthmom" is very insensitive to me. A child's first mom is not the adoptive couple's posessesion. Even if you use the term birthmom, she is the child's birthmom, only.