The lawyer called.  The clerk has put us on the judge's calendar for Dec. 18th at 10:30 am.  Finally, after 3.5 years, our children's youngest sibling will legally be a member of our family even though she's been a member of our family since she was three days old.  But by golly, it will be nice to make it legal finally.

We tried to discuss it today at breakfast. But my oldest, who is seven seemed to have some trouble processing it.

Hey guys, guess what?  We get to go to the judge and finish your sister's adoption!

"mom, do birthmother's have to ask permission from a judge to be a mommy?"

no

"but, they just grow a baby and then that's it?"

yup

"but YOU have to ask the judge to be the mommy?"

yup

"cuz we didnt' grow in your tummy?"

right.

"so if we grew in your tummy, you wouldn't need a judge?"

you got it.

"ok. can I have a girl then when i grow up?  I want her to grow in my tummy cuz I don't want to talk to a judge" All of this from my seven year old followed by my six year old son with,

"NOW can I get a brother?"

yes, we've been thinking about that alot lately...

Onward then,  to pursue adopting a fourth child and the vote is unanimous, the kids want a brother.  I try to tell them that's not how adoption works, that you don't just go shopping for a child, that it is exceedingly more complicated than that.  (If only they knew!)  I am still processing idea of adding a second extended first family for another child added to our current children's extended first family and boy is that overwhelming for me because I'm a "small numbers are better" kind of gal.   I'm also overwhelmed by the process of adopting again when our first three - natural siblings - kind of landed in our lap.  I dont' even know where to start. 

All of that and the desire to parent more children is still so great, it reduces me to tears - at the site of McDonald's commercials and in the baby isles at Walmart and God help me, everytime I hear a baby cry at the grocery store.  (i hate estrogen at 33 and being infertile - the spouse asked me the other day during a particularly painful bout of cramps what he could do for me and I said, "cut out my uterus.")  All kidding aside, the old addage passed down by the women in my family is that you'd know when your family was complete when you felt like the investment in a small child was more trouble than it was worth; when you felt like you just didn't have it in you to parent one more.  No way do i feel like that yet.  Mark my words, the judge hasn't seen the last of us.