We have the opportunity to interview Micky Duxbury, adoptive mom, therapist and author of the open adoption book Making Room in Our Hearts. Micky has graciously agreed to answer some of our questions about open adoption and it's a great chance to talk to someone knowledgable, informed and pro-openness. Please submit your questions to me either via the comments here, through private message or through the site contact form. They can be about open adoption as a trend, practical questions about living it, or about her process as an author. I'll leave this post on the front page as long as I'm taking questions.
Here's more about her book:
Making Room In Our Hearts explores how families navigate these complex human relationships over time. Fully open adoption is not the model for all adoptions, but the increasing numbers of families that choose or evolve into openness, need a map to show them the way. This book will do that by showing the challenges of openness and by collecting heart-warming stories of families throughout the United States that have been living open adoption for years. Their stories will tell why they chose open adoption, how it has evolved for them, and how they cope with the gains, the losses, and the occasional logistical nightmares, all for the sake of the child.
Over one hundred and fifty birth or adoptive family members across the United States responded to a questionnaire and/or a phone or in-person interview for this book. The families varied in age, in socio-economic status, and in city or country location, and included transracial and multi-cultural families, divorced, single parents, and gay and lesbian households. There are a total of thirty-two birth parents, eight birth grandparents, fifty-three adoptive parents, and twenty-five adopted children whose voices are directly heard in the book. Many of the profiled families reported doing well in managing these complex, challenging, and novel relationships.
Families who have been living fully open adoption have much to teach us. They want to speak about their challenges, their disappointments, the occasional logistical nightmares, and most of all, about their hopes and dreams for their children. For the sake of their child's ability to form an integrated sense of self, they have taken risks they never imagined they would take, opened themselves up to people they might not usually befriend, and formed ties that often last a lifetime. Theirs is a commitment that understood that for children to have permanent, secure and loving homes, they did not have to lose their connection to the people who gave them life.
