am the mother of an amazing 12 year old , when he was 8 I went thru a terrible rough patch and wanted what was best for my son,the only place I could find work was as a civilan contractor in Afghanistan and a then family member offered to look after my son, I signed temporary custody papers while out of the country , She promised me it all , she would never stop my son from seeing me , never stop phone calls , emails and skype etc….. She THEN told me if I didn’t sign adoption papers she would go to the courts and say I had abandoned my son …….. My son and I had the most amazing relationship ….. I signed the papers ( I made a bad choice) she then in turn once she got what she wanted stopped all calls, skype , visits ,cards etc….., My head was spinning thinking my son was expecting these things and I could do nothing about it she would put the cards etc.. in the trash, she would often send me texts saying my son thought I was just a cash cow etc……… My heart is broken and I know inside my son is thinking my mum just left me. I was going to try and visitations thru the courts and try to explain to a judge the stress this woman put me under.. Does anyone think I have a chance?
Do I have the chance to get my son back?
– September 26, 2012Posted in: Community Wisdom
What an agonizing place to be in. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
I would suggest meeting with a lawyer and talking about it. I don’t know the laws where you live but I do believe that a legally finalized adoption is irreversable. I would also suggest trying to get your sons adoptive mother into some kind of mediation with you. Perhaps the agency/lawyer who facilitated the adoption is a good place to start … many have ongoing assistance. Even if the adoption can’t be reversed, you did agree to openness and she hasn’t kept her side of that promise. Did you keep the emails from her that promised you ongoing contact / openness? That would be very helpful. Especially with that in hand, I would hope that you do have a chance to have an open relatonship with your son.
I also wonder if the military would have any kind of support for you. I would assume you’re not the only one who’s child was in someone else’s custory while serving. It wouldn’t hurt to ask.
I wish you the best of luck and hope you let us know what happens