My husband and I adopted our daughter in March 2009 and it was an open adoption with visits from the birth mother. Birth mother decided to take us to court and to make a long story short, we won the case. In October, the Judge recommended that we begin “contact” going slowly and cautiously and persue couseling to help establish boundaries. The relationship we have is very unsteady and unhealthy and persuing a relationship is not in the best interest for our daughter but we feel we need to try. Our couseling appointment is in February and was put off because of the birth mother dragging her feet. Since October, my husband and I have been sending letters and pictures of our little girl to get them up to speed since we were not allowed to talk during the case. Recently I have visited a facebook page that the birth family has with our daughters pictures that we sent to them all over it. They haven’t really told anyone that they placed her up for adoption and are fantasizing raising her. We are actually planning on discussing this with the birth mom at the counseling session. Has anyone dealt with this before? We live in the same town as the birth family and we feel we deserve a right to privacy. Is there a way to monitor this without accepting them as friends? Are there any laws that can protect our privacy. Am I over-reacting. I need any advice.
– February 1, 2010Posted in: Community Wisdom