How do others balance all the family at the holidays?

My birthday is Dec 18 and DS’s is Jan 2, with Christmas, obviously right in between

We have three “sets” of DS’s first family that visit, and all want to come during the holidays and/or near his birthday.

One SIL + family moved to our area last year, and the other SIL + family are in the process of moving here, my parents and my brother and his DD all live here, and of course all want family get togethers at the holidays. And even if they could do without seeing me and DH, EVERYONE wants to see DS of course.

It was just me and DH for over a decade when we lived in another state away from both families, and we did what we wanted during the holidays. Sometimes that included traveling to see family, but not very often. Mostly it was just us, quietly, or we would get a mountain cabin or something, or eat dinner out instead of cooking.

Now that we have all these people around, and a much bigger family with DS and his first family, I feel stressed and crazy already! Any suggestions on having good holidays without ripping my hair out?

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